Reaction to “the schoolyard forever”

My personal reaction and insight on Bukowski's poem

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Reaction to “the schoolyard forever”

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It’s been a long time since I’ve opened this chapter of my book. Most of me really doesn’t want to, but a teeny tiny part is telling me that I can either or face it run from it. I can’t bring myself to to the latter.

Bullying makes one feel hopeless. You can try to stop it but no one cares. No one helps you. They will even join in on it. It stays with you, even after all the jerks are gone. You will always question every friendship, every relationship, every motive. Are we really friends? Why did they leave me out? Are they mad at me? Do I do something wrong? How can I fix it ? What am I fixing? Why does this hurt so much? The tears that slide down your cheeks splatter onto your heart and leave permanent stains. You will never ever be the same. Your doubts and fears will overrule all logic and reasoning. It will cause you to feel physically sick, or be in pain. No thought, no dreams, no hope will be safe from everlasting negativity that came from bullying.

I will always have doubt.

I will always have insecurities.

I will always carry that ugly part around with me.

But I try to bury it everyday with memories of happiness. So that I will not be buried in the sadness and anxiety the visit with the memories of being bullied.

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